Perseverance Story: Jennifer Peter VanDuren

Photo courtesy of Heather Eveland Photography.

Over the course of four weeks, members of the community will be sharing their story.  These stories are about individuals and their experience with cancer. They are the reason the Lowell community comes together for the Pink Arrow Football Game.  Each story is written by the person you will read about or by someone on their behalf. We thank them for sharing their story and courage.

Photo courtesy of Heather Eveland and is used with permission.   Heather donates her time to get to know those she is photographing and capture an image to be used with each story.  You can visit her photography website and Facebook page for more information about her work.  

Heather is also the volunteer coordinator for Pink Arrow events.  If you are interested in helping out at Community Day (Thursday, Aug. 16) or game day (Thursday, Aug. 30) please contact her by calling 616-291-8907 or send an email to [email protected].  Heather will let you or your group know what help is needed to determine the best fit.  

The following story is from Jennifer Peter VanDuren.  She tells her cancer story.

I was diagnosed with breast cancer 3 months after my yearly exam. My husband found the very large lump and it is hard to believe we all missed it. I knew I was in real trouble. They told me I was 2B which is very close to stage 3. As it turns out I was 3B and very close to stage 4. The beginning of treatment was hard with many tests in the first and second week restricted by the stage two assignment. Then I began a tough 20 week chemo treatment, starting with the ‘red devil’.

Gilda’s Club helped me see that the treatment was hard and that it’s okay to have some emotional problems afterwards. I didn’t deal with much during the treatment and left it all for the end. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. The side effects have become a part time job.  My immune system could be stronger and I’m more sensitive. I struggle fitting my side effects into my daily life. I’m also struggling with all this fuss over little cuts or poison ivy but often find myself in real trouble quickly.

They say you learn who your friends are during a trauma, and boy did I. I have the best friends in the whole world. I cannot thank them enough for their kind words and hugs. Each sent and did a little, and it turned into a pile of love.  One friend, Pam Geenen stayed by my side the whole time, which I’m sure was hard, as she had lain to rest so many in her family from cancer. Their love helped me through more than anything. My daughter was a trooper helping in so many uncountable ways; she attended most appointments and she was tasked with taking back a land contract just as I was diagnosed. My son pitched in for the more work type things that needed to be done. Like the room we started remodeling that needed a new roof, new floor and drywall. My husband stepped up to help where ever he could, but overall I think it was an incredibly nerve wracking experience for him. He provided great insurance which believe me took a huge burden off my shoulders. Don navigated the insurance system for me paying and solving billing questions and errors. Everyone should receive such solid benefits for their protection. Don’s corporate headquarters is in Laval, Quebec and the company evened out their plans a few years ago maintaining our benefits to match the other countries the company operates in, and I got to enjoy the benefits.

My family of origin was not so much help. One sister asked me when I would quit chemo!!! Three times!!! I tried to clarify but she did too.  Before treatment this was almost too devastating for me to deal with, and led to me emotionally shut down for the treatment. This was a huge burden for me.

Photo courtesy of Heather Eveland Photography.

My life has changed, but I do feel I am a stronger and a more focused individual. I wrote a book about my country childhood and made it funny, if a little tragic. I’m re-editing it now and laugh at my own jokes, trials, and tribulations of life outside the city. I would call myself a country mouse and compare myself to a city mouse always wondering what they were doing all day. I had 40 acres and a tractor and horse to entertain me. I also worried about the city kids playing in parking lots and not getting enough to eat.

I actually don’t want to talk about myself. I want to talk about Gilda’s Club in Lowell. I do struggle emotionally and cannot grasp the love and support I have received in Lowell. Sometimes when I walk in I start crying. I thank the women, men, and sports teams who feed me. They seem so casual.  It’s not casual to me. It’s a tremendous support mechanism. I’ve always lived somewhat through food and so the food is especially comforting to me. Chemo tried to kill my love for food and I still struggle with enjoying or consuming food. Eating with others helps the joy return. The women who attend are wonderfully supportive, smart and funny. What more could I ask for?? Well I could ask for great counselors, but Gilda’s had already achieved that level of performance, and I am so appreciative of that structure being in place. I may have picked up PTSD during treatment, and Gilda’s may help me with that soon.

The other thing I cannot quite grasp is the forethought and planning Grand Rapids had 30 years ago to save me from cancer in 2017. Wow, you started saving my life just as I was having children. I think about that long term planning everyday and cannot thank the people enough. They say if you want to make a difference in a year plant a garden, if you want make a difference in 20 years you plant a tree, and if you want to change the world you raise a child. I guess Grand Rapids raised a pretty grand ‘child’ in their new medical mile and it is changing the world.  Saying thank you seems so inadequate.

When I was first diagnosed I felt like a minnow caught in a net, and I just wanted to be released. Now that it’s over I realize I was actually in a ‘catch and release’ program and I just got released. Just as I was formulating this ‘release’ thought Gilda’s signed me up to go fly fishing on the Ausable River near Mio! Somehow I feel the world is cheering me on. Catching and releasing other fish is my final stage before I can swim away and live the rest of my life. I want to build an old folks home for me and my friends. Now that I’m enjoying Gilda’s I want a Gilda’s next door with a day care in between. That would be heaven on earth to me!  I’m not dead yet. Still kicking and causing trouble.

 

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